...Protection from Mental Decay since 2010... Protection from Mental Decay since 2010... Protection from Mental Decay since 2010...







Monday 2 April 2012

McNumpty Strikes Again.


Well dear friend, a year hath passedeth sincth I latht updated thith blog and crickey where hath thith lithp come from? Thurely Me and the Mighty McNumpty don't have a thingle communicative flaw between uth.

And yet. And yet. Phil has been up to his old tricks again, writing in treble dutch about premiership Atlases without a compass, Wolves. Here's a flavour, a back from the dead flavour like a kitchen supper for zombies round at call me Dave's......that makes little sense but it doesn't matter because for one night only, Phil McNumpty's Catechism of Cliche is Back!

That's a remarkable silence you detected at Molynieux, Phil. What did you alone hear in it?

- I heard the echo of resignation, wait, and I heard the echo of relegation.

What a remarkably echo-ey load of non-sounds from the Midlands, Phil.

YODEL-EH-OOP-EEEEE-OO! Cup o Bovril please Duck! Ta!

At the opposite poles of the class system Phil, you note it's not just Betty Windsor suffering from identity issues but also sacked ex-manager Mick McMousey who habitually employs which first person plural when talking about Wolves?

- Ah you must mean "the Wolves 'we'."

Indeed I do.

Do Posh Mick and Wolves have a Bentley Continental or an Ant Hill Mob 1927 Big Six President Model ES-7 passenger sedan Studebaker to travel between leagues, then, Phil?

-No.

So how pray tell are Mick's Wolves going to get to the Championship?

- They will walk there of course.

I bet they'll get the bus back though, eh?

That penalty decision, Phil.

- Yes?

The one debated, long and loud as though with one voice, between the whole of Mick's Wolves and Molineux and the entire city of Bolton.

-Yes?

Who was the debate settled by, single handed, from the rostrum of the spot, like the noble Mark Antony after the death of Caesar?

- By Petrov of course!

And Mick's Wolves you say have accelerated that walk to the championship, despite having wilted like neglected flowers?

- What of it?

So, they're power-walking to the Championship like thirsty invading alien ambulatory killer flora, the triffids, in search of a drink, Phil?

- You might say that. If you were being pedantic.

The last word there to the great man. Don't miss his latest nonsensical masterpiece of metaphorical admixture at

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/philmcnulty/2012/03/ wolves_plight_exposes_patchwor.html


10 comments:

  1. fuckin' brilliant. The sound of fuckin' silence. Hello darkness my old friend, so pleased you've come to talk to us again!

    Genius.

    And as for Phil, well, if he was at Wolves v Bolton they're still asking him to cover all the big games!

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    Replies
    1. Why thank you trots although I still suspect you are using the word genius rather loosely ie in the sense of "pretty pointless reslly"

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  2. fuck that visible after approval lark. I'll be back to check next Monday morning' and if it's not up by then there'll be more than trouble at mill.

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  3. Made too much sense for a McNulty blog.

    Just need Mr Blue Burns to be all over this pretending he is the great knowing and seeing soothsayer of football.

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    Replies
    1. Heh heh jacks...rba...sob now he was the man

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  4. Hahaha. Welcome back blogidy! Pls keep writing these cliche versions of McNumpty's drivel on BBC.

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    Replies
    1. Cheers ss. To be fair to the great man he does have a unique random bag of scrabble tiles in a bag approach to cliche though

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  5. It almost makes me want to go and read his column.....

    Almost.

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  6. Can't believe it's still going tbh H but I guess he has his demographic, sanctimonious middle class bores by the look of the comments section

    Look out for the Xmas 2023 edition of this blog..."McNumpty Still writing the same old befuddled Crap"

    ReplyDelete

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